The Dusk of My Decisions

In the dusk of my decisions, when the time is at an end

I fear that I will not have said enough to each my friend.

I wish for all the greatest joy, a chance to right each wrong.

A granted sigh, a sweet reply, a voice that’s shared in song.

 

To capture sunrise in your mind, release the pain and greed.

To dance upon the meadow’s grass and fill your love’s great need.

Come take my hand while there’s still time, we’ll share the day with sun,

we’ll roll down hills with blades in hair, restore our child of fun.

 

And when my friend is sad and gray, and nighttime finds her blue

I wish to wrap my arms around her life and help her through.

For such my life is filled with light from those I’m blessed to know.

Once strangers now a close duet, now more that help me so.

 

I raise my love to all around this earth, a humbled gift

for those so dear, in troubled fear,  my words I hope uplift.

I close my eyes as the day goes by, I pray for might to try.

I blend my thoughts to practice all, to reach my God on high.

 

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Shaded Eyes

Somehow I imagine the dragon got her in its sooty ruse.
Surrounded the beautiful blond with smoke and flame
wrought a darkness beyond the tattoos
and called her back with a caressing voice by her name.

She fought so hard, she willed the monster away
as she built a life with her little guy growing.
But inside was a temptation too great, a fate this day
that remembered the sadness that was showing.

A night stained black but lit from fire
revealed the struggle she scraped each night.
The pain, the hurt, the burn, so dire,
with fists upraised against hell’s pitch, the fight.

Perhaps one more flight as she leaped upon its back
and steered the fiery creature away from child.
A lasting look at peace,  beast released in final attack
as she raced it  from home, numb to the wild.

The dragon, I imagine, flew her to it’s lair
to the cursed beginning with its sharp pointed grasp,
and way it lay it’s head in her lap, a dare,
as it clawed and pawed in confusion’s clasp.

Innocence lost a mother, a cost of fantasy, a husk
believing that both can survive
the wings, the things that live in slated dusk,
tragedy reaping, overtaking shaded eyes, no longer alive.

Filling in the Silence

In the house the noise is silent until  my hands are laid on  keys,

the tapping of my mind now fills the void, a voice that sets my ease.

In language of my doing I create such words to sing,

the pulse of life, each beat of breath, upon this earth I bring.

For in my world, yes, in my soul, there lives a need to say

convictions lived within my heart need opening my own way.

I breathe right in, then let it out, this freeing act of  sound,

surround myself with words I’ve born, for strength to fight what’s found.

For fear is rigid, strong inside, but so’s my inner roar

as I live on through out each dawn I stand, I sing, I soar.

Handed to me is a key that unlocks my ability

to share my style, my coated throat, in lyrics that I see.

So once inside a silent room, my English echos with each click,

an epic ballad, not so bad, as I linger with each finger to craft each word I pick.

Live Life

Life slips through our fingers one moment at a time,

sometimes with no sense, no rhythm or no earthly rhyme.

 

We fell compelled to make our way  through the path of journey’s day

never thinking this could be the one, the second that could be all done.

With flowers in my hair I dance for this may be my only chance

to share the sway, this way I feel to be with Jim, our love so real.

Our fingers laced, our shoes untied we laugh, we trip, we slowly glide

for our lives are shared with joyful bliss each night we turn for goodnight’s kiss.

Thinking back over twenty years we slept the night shift bringing tears

to be apart, no morning breath, no opened eyes just loneliness, just no surprise.

But now!  We share the night we longed as teens,  to hold, to hug, who cares the means?

Just impressed to be as one,  each night we fall to arms. May other’s dreams  savor love with all it’s charms.

I’m blessed and rich in pearl’s not bought but rather words that come to me from all I’ve thought.

 

Hold tight to love  within each one’s  grasp

for life is brief,  love- relief,  and hands for another’s clasp.

 

 

 

My love

I search the breeze for the leftover scent of our time-

the inhalation of our meeting, our lips together, our breath fast,

the presence of more than just two souls

but a spiritual intercession

fanning our life into a great bonfire of love

exploding between us.

I awoke with the imprint of your love

still faint on my cheek,

the brush of your fingers touch against my skin,

the lovely lines of your wrinkles found with an index

and my soul nourished with our union.

We are one together as thirty years brings back

teenagers in a rush to be grown, to be joined,

to raise a family with the Trinity our only value in life.

Our saving grace was our salvation that saved us

generations ago in youth ministry

when first we danced, first we saw,

first we knelt together in prayer.

You are my answered plea, my ability to keep on,

the strength that attaches me to the holy family,

to the spirit that surrounds us,

and to God who created this world

for us living side by side.

I curl an arm around your pillow,

breathe in your ways

as you offer your day earned

as a gift to our family.

I love you.

 

 

 

My Thirst

I remember the sound of peace crackling in my voice

as we listened to the raw trauma turn

from the tide of defiance crashing through the calm

to the settled sense of acceptance.

I  soothed as I reaped the prescribed herbs,

the treatment that planted possibilities into my mind.

I grew from the desperate, the despair,  to the fabulous becoming of myself.

Where I shared the daring edges of my life with symptoms,

reached out from  the unprotected view to reality shown to others.

The depression that darkened days,

voices that cried out, that disturbed my insides,

heartaches of such delusions,

twisted anxiety of falling, failing again,

and trepidation of being shunned.

But the colored bouquets of creation

birthed beautiful moments

that filled my arms with the bounty

of life understanding- me!

The compassion I savored

touched my thirsty lips and I drank in the goodness

from others that  I once had feared to find.

 

 

 

 

Altar Boy

My son wears the robes of an altar boy.
His hair still stuck up in the front corner,
reminding me of my baby brother.
His eyes stare over the tops of heads
as he focuses on the whiteness of the ceiling,
Tries not to distract from his job
And I smile at such innocence,
Such beauty in the light that gathers in his eyes.
The tabernacle of himself almost now surrounded in an aura,
as he folds his hands
In a prayer, bows,
And takes in Jesus, consumes Him
Up there by the altar.
I pray to Mary, mother to mother,
To grow both our sons inside.
To model the goodness that projects.
To shower my son with the radiance of love
From the holy family,
And from his guardian angel
That protects and identifies our son,
Standing in prayer by Father,
as our Michael.